Jeffrey Michael Kirk

September 30, 1969 - January 7, 2003

09/30/1969 - 01/07/2003

Past Services

Service
Friday January 10, 2003
Services will be held in Vermont
VT
Directions

Jeffrey Michael Kirk, 33, of Norfolk died on January 7, 2003.

Jeffrey was an avid Denver Bronco football fan.

He is survived by his father, Charles M. Kirk; mother, Debra Sanders; and two brothers, Matthew J. Kirk and Jake Kenney.

Funeral services will be held in Vermont on Friday, January 10, 2003.

Altmeyer Funeral Home, Virginia Beach Chapel is in charge of the arrangements.

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Matthew
8 years ago

2 months, when will the pain stop?

I love you, Matthew

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

37…

I miss you…

I still miss you…

I hear you…

I pray for you…

I think about you…

I want to give you a birthday like the last one I gave you. When you were a king for one day… where everyone one treated you as such for that day. I still remember you stepping out of that limo… You looked like caesar. That party stretched 50 miles and 8 hours… countless friends gathered, and the Kirk boys showing everyone what a celebration should be.

The Kirk boys… I miss that… we were larger than life… and I struggle with finding that missing piece… the piece that makes me part of something better and bigger than me as an individual.

Jeffrey… I want to tell you about my sons…

Parker has a heart larger than yours… and that says alot…his brains are only out matched by his wit…..he loves me so much I can physically feel it and it is like a drug to me…..

and Cullen…oh boy… Cullen is a walking sun… he fills everyone he meets with happiness and warmth… he is perfect to be your name sake… he embodies the basic premise of your short life… smiles, hugs, kisses and love.

I have changed ……and my life now consists of trying to sort out the me I truely am… I have had to come to grips with the fact that I am changed so deeply that my actual core is altered… my very beliefs, values, morals, loves, hates, desires, thoughts, and goals all need to be re-evaluated.

I have not yet drawn any conclusions, and sadly I have no answers…yet.

Happy Birthday. Happy Birthday. Happy Birthday. This is a day to be celebrated, a day when a man was born into the world who had a profound impact on every one he came in contact with. I love you and thank you for teaching me to love like you.

Martin says Hi.

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

4 years today. Too much to say. Not enough space and or time. Life is changing for me. Watch over me. I love you.

Matthew.

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

6 years.

I love you Jeffrey.

Dads with you now. Grandpa is with you now… Have a beer for me…

You are sorely missed. I miss you so much.

Matthew

debbie sanders
8 years ago

a year ago today I lost my mom, your gramma. In the next 2 days, my pain escalated as I got the news you had died. Was gramma waiting for you? I have a void where you should be and an ache where you were. I love you so very much and miss you daily. This year I am concentrating on the celebration of your life with me, in hopes the hurt will diminish. All my love and prayers for you are there.

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Alright bro… the expected happened about 10 days ago, I lost it, due to your selfishness, I finally had enough. But it all turned out for the best. Because ever since that day I have been fine, pre-1/07/03 fine. Loving my wife, kid, job, LIFE!!! Its your fault you are not here and I finally see that. I have turned my head toward the prize, youare always in my heart, but I have to move on.

Love you, eternally

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Alright Jeff, in case you haven’t heard its your favorite day of the year, Superbowl Sunday!!!! Pete got the whole family Raider Hater T-Shirts and we will be screaming at the TV all day long for the Bucaneers to win, just so the largest rival of the Broncos in history gets there butts kicked.

Hey Jeff….its not the same without you, but I am trying…

David & Sandy Leadbetter
8 years ago

Although Sandy & I knew Jeffrey only 2 short years, he became part of our immediate family. He celebrated not only the Holidays with us, but provided us with many laughs and great times at our Winston Cup and Super Bowl parties. He and Matt were the center of attention many times remember the bottle rockets Matt?

He loved Jeff Gordon don’t ask me why, and I once had to pay him $50 in pennies over a lost bet on Gordon’s stats…

He was a loving person with a very big heart, who will be missed dearly by his many friends and by most of all, those closest to him.

We will always love you Jeff.

With a very heavy heart,

David & Sandy Leadbetter

01/09/2003

Martin Shaffer
8 years ago

As I sit here tonight thinking about what tomorrow means it seems to me that over time it means less and less. I have come to see Jeff as he lived more than how he died. As we all move further away from the trauma of those very dark days it easier to recal the memories with out reliving the pain. Tomorrow is a marker like April 14 is for my marrage or Nov 3 is for my life. They do not represent me and I hope i think of my marrage on more than just the date that it happened or my life more than once a year. Jeff brought so much to my life and the memories of those contributions are recalled often through stories i tell and love that i share. Jan 7 may be the period in the story of his life but it does negate or end the value that the story itself holds. I love you buddy but you know that because i told you just last week.

Matthew J. Kirk
8 years ago

Cullen Jeffrey Michael turns one tomorrow… I wish he knew you…He is so full of life… he is so beautiful.

I love him so much and I see you in him, and it feels as though you are here.

Michelle is pregnant, and expecting a boy. I am so happy for her and I am very sad I am not closer to the Vermont side of our family… It is so far away that is seems no matter how we try the distance is too much.

Natalie graduated from High School, can you believe it, she is an adult… how life changes.

There are days when I dont think about you and it is so scarey… I am getting to a point know that I realize things… like very soon I will be older than you. Ha I am the big brother now… you would be so mad if you were here to hear me say that. I always watch the wedding video and think of you…You are so beautiful… I find myself missing you to the core, not just what seemed to be superficial pain before… but now core deep… to the point where it feels like a growth inside me.

This is going to sounds so stupid but just to say it once will help.

“Will you please come back?”

I miss you I need you around… I love you… I have realized no one will ever be able to replace you..ever.. which means I have to have to!live with this void in me…. I hate it.. there always seems to be something missing in everything I do…

Finally.. no one understands me like you… I am always feeling as though I have to defend being me…

I love you and miss you now more than ever… your little brother,

Matthew J Kirk

Anne
8 years ago

Dear Heavenly Father, 10/01/04

Thanks for taking care of both our “September” guys up there. Thank you for providing a “way” for us to be with you, in all your perfect glory. Thanks for your grace and love, and assuring us that we will be together again, since we have trusted in you, and not ourselves. Hug them both for me. I miss them both so much. I know you are wiping any tears from their eyes. Let them know we are ok. And please keep wiping the tears from our eyes. Thanks for understanding our grief and pain. You made us like you… I know you understand. Thank you for the hope in the midst of the pain.

“For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.” John 3:16-17

debbie
8 years ago

Dear Jeff,

Its been a very long road these last 3 years….Pete and I moved to Virginia Beach to be closer to Matt,Nikki, and boys…and it puts Jake only a few hours away.

Our move here would have made you so happy, all of us close together,and now you’re gone……

The little boys in our lives are truly gifts from God. He knew how much we needed a little Cullen. Just seeing him makes my day. You should be here for one of his diapers that have him christened as Mr Poo. Great moments in time! He also would have cracked you up with his faces.

Parker is at an age that you would have loved to take him to baseball games, and Pete has decided that they will do hockey games together. I remember your visits to Mile High and Coors fields, how much you loved the games. You were the fan of fans! I hope they play baseball where you are, and you get to be back on 1st base again, wow, you were good! I remember when you forgot to eat before a playoff game,because you were so excited to play; and almost passed out playing because it was 98 degrees out and we were on American Cyanimid baseball field, full of those awful chemicals in the air. You had no intention of not playing, and insisted a quick soda could put you back out on the field,and you’d be fine. You were great! I was so proud of you, that day and alot of other times thru out your life. I will always have you in my heart..my little ungee J boogerman!

As you probably know the Broncos are in the playoffs! We get an occasional Bronco sunset here, I always give you the credit.

love mom

Laurie Ross
8 years ago

Dear Matthew,

You, like your dear brother Jeff, have a great big heart. Right now that heart is full of pain, and your family and friends would do anything to lessen your burden. The question is: what to do?

For what it’s worth, when I find myself despondent over Jeff’s decision, I remind myself that we are all on this earth for an undetermined period of time, and that life, for any one of us, could end in a split second. Jeff’s life was a gift to us, so perhaps his death has something to give us as well? Hasn’t it brought us all together in a deeper way? Maybe that was the reason. Maybe that is what we needed to learn – not to take anything or anyone for granted.

Dear Matt, take comfort is the blessings you have: a loving family, a wonderful wife and the greatest friends in the world. Let’s all count our blessings so that Jeff’s legacy is what I know he would want; a legacy of love.

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Happy Belated Birthday,

I scheduled the National Bartender Olympics for the same day as your Birthday, so I wouldn’t have to think about it, but guess what, it didnt work, I still could not get you off my mind.

Jenn
8 years ago

Happy Birthday Jeff. I wish for so many that you were here to celebrate. I think of you often…especially when a digital clock reads 9:30. You always got such a kick out of that. I do know this…you are looking down on your brother Matt…and you are smiling that incredible smile we all remember…with tears in your eyes. You are proud. Evidently, you just had to do it from a distance.

debbie sanders
8 years ago

Happy Birthday Jeffrey,

You are in my thoughts, and it seems much sadder than last year. Maybe its just settled more within me. Your brothers miss you as we all do. “It is a beautiful day ” —here on Roatan, as you would like to say. You would have loved this move that Pete and I made. You would have said, its the right thing to do, to put me first ,for a change!! I miss your support when I made changes. You were always so happy whenever any of your family was in a good place. Cullen Jeffrey Michael is a precious gift from God for us, and we all are wrapped up in the joy he has brought. we love you , and oh my, how we miss you.

mom and pete

mom
8 years ago

happy birthday, mom

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Happy Valentines Day, I love you.

Matthew

His Brother
8 years ago

Hey bro!!!

A bunch of our friends got to together tonight and sang like we used to, this a “Beautiful Day” was not the same without you, but it was in your honor.. I miss you so much… please keep looking down on me.. I need you. Love always.

Your Brother, Matchewbubblegumpoopoobearhineyhead Kirk

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Hey Brother…You are slowly becoming a memory and that is scary as hell. I do not want you to be a memory…

Jake Kenney
8 years ago

Hey bud missing you but things are well for me. I’m the new Technical Director of a theater in rutland and I haven’t even graduated yet. well things are good and that’s what matters right? anyway like I said missing you bro

Chuck & Shelly Kirk
8 years ago

Hey Jeff, Man this is the hardest time of my life, not having you to worry about. I’m sick with hurt knowing you’ll never call me again from one of your trips around the country. You were my first child and although we were children when we had you I wish to God that I’d been more mature and was a better dad. Jeff, I hope that in your heart you did forgive me for my absence in your life. I also thank the Lord that you had such a good mother and brother, they were always there for you. God this hurts. I miss you so. I know that Shelly also miss you she cries along with me when we think of your last meeting and lunch together in October of 2002 in Raton, NM. Jeff I really hope you made peace with the Lord Jesus before you left. I want to see you again.

Love, Dad and Shelly

Marie
8 years ago

Hey Jeffrey, Merry Christmas. Wish you could be here to celebrate with us!! We miss you, your great smile and constant chatter. We will be thinking of you and everyone else that is with you. Give them all our love.

Nikki Kirk
8 years ago

Hi Jeff. I just told you Happy Birthday but I forgot Happy Halloween, Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. They’re not the same without you. You are always in our hearts.

-sis

Marie
8 years ago

Hi Jeffrey, well it’s been a year now that you’ve been gone and on the 5th it’s been a month since grandpa joined you. Just wanted to let you know we miss you both very much and hope together you will watch down on us and keep us safe.

Love always,

Aunt Marie

P.S. Give my dad a hug for me.

Nikki Kirk
8 years ago

Hi Jeffrey. Happy Birthday! We miss you very much down here. I was just remembering the 1st Vermont trip you and your brother took me on. We were driving through Canada and it was snowing like hell and there was a car stuck in the snow in the median. You and your brother, always the heroes, decided to pull off and run across the highway to make sure the passengers were o.k. You told me to stay in the car to be safe. As soon as you two crossed the road I looked out the back window and saw a semi truck coming towards me in a jack-knife position. So I undid my seat belt in the speed of light and ran out of the car into a field where the snow was about 2 feet high. As soon as I turned around to watch the truck slam into our car he corrected the truck and kept on going. You should’ve seen your faces. Thinking I would be safer in the car.lol

GREAT memories!!!

Well guy, I love you and I miss you and I think about you all the time. I think your name sake is going to be a hellian just like you. He has quite the attitude.

See you in about 50 or 60 years honey; save me a seat.

Love,

Nikki

Nancy aunt
8 years ago

Hi Sweetheart, I know your birthday is coming up … hard to believe you would be creeping up on 40 now.

I worry about Matt – he misses you so. His health scare last week had us all very worried. We dont tell him as much as we should how much we love him….we never told you enough either…I am so sorry for that. I see you every day now, Matt gave us all a framed photo of you at the wall in DC. I love it.

I took Natalie to Italy Sept 14-23. We had a great time, she is really growing up. She misses talking to you. You always helped her so much with her life issues. Matt has taken over for you there, I am grateful, she drains me sometimes…as good as she is. You would be proud of her…shes doing ok. Grandma is turning 80 this November…seems hard to believe wish you could be here with us to celebrate. We will be missing you…as always. Happy Birthday

Love Nancy

Alicia Aguilar
8 years ago

I am really sorry to hear about Jeff. The last I saw Jeff was in Trinidad, CO. He used to stay with his brother Matthew. We would always come into Wal-mart and make all us jewerly women smile. He was a really great guy and a good person to hang out with.

mom
8 years ago

I know you are at peace and the thought of that makes me happy; but, I miss you so much. Matt and Jake keep my life enormously wonderful. Love you…mom

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

I love you… Miss you… thank you for the blessing in my life that you were… I will hold you up as a heart that was always true… you were all forgiving… never held a grudge… that is something to be proud of. Rest in Peace my friend, confidant, and brother… my heart hasnt changed for you… your still in it… and of course never forgotten…

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

I miss you very much, I feel as though I have didged the issue since the day youleft, I cannot seem to grasp my hearts true feelings it is all a jumble. I love you and as I said I miss you.. Nikki misses and loves you.

Matthew

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

I miss you…

You are memory now…

That hurts.

watch over me.

Rachel
8 years ago

I miss your smile, but it’s always and forever a wonderful memory in my head. :

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

I need you…

talk to me.

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

I waited… I waited ten days to write this. I didnt write an email to everyone like I wanted to. I didnt invite friends to mourn. I simply went to the location where you did it…

I drove to east bumfuzz Suffolk. parked at the end of a narrow hunting road and Martin and I slowly walked back to the area where you did it.. You may be asking why I would do such a thing. Well quite simply it is because the vision in my nightmares of what the place looked like was 100 times worse than it actually was. So I walked that long dirt trail to about the area where you changed everyones life forever… I didnt cry… I was lonely and sad… You must have felt so lonely out there, it was dreary and cold, not as cold as the day you did it, but cold.

You had no right to feel lonely, you had no right to do what you did. You were loved by many, you chose to feel lonely.

Ten days after the date was what I alloted myself to wait to write here. I wanted to see how everyone was doing. I got 2 phone calls that day mom, dad, jake called the night before. The rest are coming to grips, the rest are settling down, the rest have made peace.

I miss your smell…Your hugs…

Your laugh… and most of all your smile…

Dad and I are doing great, I miss him, especially now.

jane wool
8 years ago

I WILL MISS JEFF,I ONLY NEW HIM A SHORT TIME,BUT HE WAS FUNNY,AND SWEET,ILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HIM,

debbie sanders
8 years ago

It has been over a month since we lost you Jeff, and it gets no easier to find that place where the hurt will go away. On Super Bowl Sundayyou were here with me and Pete. I toasted a Fat Tire to you, and then the Raiders lost .YAHOO!!that was for you! we love you so very much . We will continue to move forward, never forgetting, only loving you. That will never change.Your brothers will grow old and remember through memories and pictures of what a great big brother you were.We were so lucky to have you, if even for the short period of time. God will keep you with him and he will do that forever, the peace you searched for is finally found. love mom

Jenn
8 years ago

It’s cold here in Minneapolis. Had to break out the winter coat.

You know the one – you bought it for me. Back when we were so poor we didn’t even have bedroom furniture.

You went out and bought me my first ‘grown up’ coat.

I just wanted you to know I still have it.

I still wear it.

I think of you every time I do.

And then I smile.

Jenn
8 years ago

Jeff I never called him Jeffrey…not even in our tougher moments… was one of the good guys. He was one of the funniest people I’ve ever known. Though our chapter together was over…it is with a heavy heart and great sadness that I think of him now. I wished for so much more for him. He deserved it…he had a heart of gold. Matt…no worries….he’s got his wings. He earned ’em. Forever more I’ll think of Jeff, in his own heaven…surrounded by friends and family, enjoying an eternity of Bronco victories. God Bless.

Marie K. Gaboriault
8 years ago

Jeff was my oldest nephew.I remember babysitting for him when he was young. Over the years, as he traveled,trying to find himself, he always kept in touch. Jeff, that meant alot to me, that you loved us so much that you took the time to stay in touch. We loved you too. Take care and where ever you are keep smiling. Love, Marie & Rob

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Jeff,

I miss you…

Mom just went home after being here for nearly 3 weeks. You were on our minds a lot. She went crazy for Cullen , he is so beautiful Jeff…

He will know you I promise…

Today is your birthday… you would have been 35. OLD MAN!!! hehe…

Dad and I are working on everything… we are going to be fine.

My new job is great and I am loving the 9 to 5… more time with my family… a value you taught me.

I never wrote to tell you that you have a new nephew, he was born 8/11 and very healthy… We named him Cullen Jeffrey Michael Kirk after his wonderful uncle.

John Kerry is running for President and we would have been fighting everyday you liberal tree hugger… but I know your still paying attention to politics up there because his theme song is a “Its a Beautiful Day” your song, coincidence I think not. Anyway I am still a die hard Republican and pulling for BUSH but that always made it fun…

I love you and Miss you terribly…still

Your Brother Matthew

Matthew
8 years ago

Jeff,today makes it month. It was the 2nd worst day since. I am very mad,I am plagued with nightmares, please help put my mind at ease, talk to the big guy, I am having a very hard time here. I needed you..and you left. I don’t know what to do now.

Matthew

Laurie Ross
8 years ago

Jeffery was my first nephew, born when I was just a teenager. I have such fond memories of his childhood. He was so beautiful, with that wonderful smile, playful nature, and that blonde, blonde hair. Jeff took his very first toddling steps into my outstretched arms! It is so painful to know he is gone from this earth, but I trust he rests in a divine embrace, free of all human pain. His death has reminded me to try and live each day as if it were my last. Thank you Jeff.

Cynthia Puglisse
8 years ago

Jeffrey taught me how to say “thank you”. Now I thank heaven that he was in my life and called me friend. His life and his death have touched me deeply and I will never forget him.

Michelle Lambert
8 years ago

Jeffrey was one of the most entertaining individuals I have ever met. He and his brother Matthew, together, brought so much laughter into my life. It is very sad to know that my cousin Matthew will now have to live without the closeness of his sibling. I cannot even imagine that kind of pain. I am praying -like everyone else- that good things will come of this. Reflecting on the week that has just passed, I think they already have. We love you Jeff, you will forever be missed.

Matthew and Nikki Kirk
8 years ago

Jeffrey was the best friend and brother a person could have, as we have said in the past his heart was so big his body couldn’t contain it. He will be missed every day for the rest of our lives, we love him with everything we have and are hoping he gets his wings soon, because Jeff as our guardian angel would mean an eternity of love.

Love forever,

Matthew and Nikki Kirk

Matthew J. Kirk
8 years ago

Jeffrey,

How things have changed since my last entry to you.

I just need you to know how much I love you and miss you.

It saddens me to know that I do not think about you everyday. That you are quite literally a memory now.

You are sorely missed.

Your Brother

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Jeffrey,

One year ago today.

I miss you as much as I did a year ago. Yesterday and today were/are filled with memories of you and the past. I cant help but relive your death over and over in my mind and it is as fresh as it was a year ago.

Ironically enough, on the anniversary of your death Nikki and I found out we are pregnant. We are going focus the upcoming year on celebrating your life and anticipate the birth of your new nephew/neice. I only wish that they would have had a chance to know you instead of you just being a story. I love you with all my heart. I miss you very much.

God Jeff, why? How could choose to miss this.

Matthew

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Jeffrey, Everywhere I turn you are there. I have the smallest memory and you are there, I turn a corner you are there. You were/are such a huge part of my life a peice is missing now, I want you back and each day is surreal it feels as though you could be back at any moment I pray each day for a dream so vivid that it feels like you are hugging me, you gave the best hugs. I am wadding daily through a sea of regret, I want to capitalize on time lost but, it is now gone, man I miss you, man,I love you. watch me, hug me, I miss you

Matthew

Matthew Kirk
8 years ago

Jeffrey, we found out it is a going to be a boy.

Cullen Jeffrey Kirk.

I got a new job that is wonderful, a ton more money, and monday through friday 9 to 5, holidays and weekends off.

Things going well, forgot you were in Dave and Sandys wedding video really hit me hard.

I love you miss you.